ONE YEAR LATER

Here I am one year later.  It was a little over a year ago that all this began.  Well... that might not be quite completely honest.  Let me start over.  Joni and I have been dancing since High School.  Our very first dance as a couple was as two teenagers at a party for the cast of one of the High School Drama productions.  I don't remember which it was,  Fiddler on the Roof... perhaps Brigadoon.  I don't remember and it doesn't matter.  What I do remember is how beautiful Joni was in her pink formal gown... and the song.  It was Chicago's "Colour My World".  "As time goes by, I realize... just what you mean to me..."  Oh... I almost forgot.  We also did some choreographed dancing in a Choral group that we were a part of.  But... Ballroom Dancing... that all started a little over a year ago.

We were on a cruise on the Carnival Dream.  Nightly we watched couple who "knew" how to dance, as they foxtrot-ed and cha-cha-ed themselves across the dance floor in the Atrium Lobby.  They looked awesome.  I thought to myself, Joni and I could do this.  But it was not those particular great dancers that ultimately inspired us.  They might have struck the match, but they were not the ones to light the wick.  That distinction goes to an elderly couple that was also on that cruise.

They had to be over 90 years old, or so I thought.  He was shorter than she was.  I would be surprised if he was over 5ft. 6in. tall.  His glasses were thick with dark plastic frames.  There were held securely in place by an elastic sport strap.  It all struck me as rather odd.  She just stayed attached to his arm and smiled... a lot.  He too smiled a lot.  And then the music would start...

Out on the dance floor then held each other and moved and swayed together.  When a faster song would begin they would bounce a little, twist a bit... and smile at each other... a lot.  I couldn't help but wonder about the conversation they must have had with their children.  "We're going on a cruise.  We're going dancing."   I imagined their 70 year old children worried about Mom and Dad...  Would they be safe?  Would they get hurt?  Or lost?   I laughed at the idea that this wrinkled old couple was having the time of the life dancing together, and worrying their children.

Late one night, well past what must have been their normal "bed time", they were gettin' their groove on... the dance floor was packed... and as the song ended there they were, right next to us.  Another couple nearby smiled and said, "I hope you don't mind me asking... but... your age??   Would you mind telling us?"  To which, with a huge smile, he didn't hesitate a response.

"I'm 85"... and then turning to his wife, he said, "She is 86."  She looked at him with eyes of romance and love, smiled, and put her head on his shoulder."  The look they shared together was priceless. 

The other couple said something else, like... "You both look great...", or something such as that, I don't remember exactly.  It was then that I caught the elderly man's attention, and I said to him... "You are my inspiration...  When I'm your age, I want to being doing exactly what you are doing."  They both smiled and returned back to their table to catch their breath before the next song began.

I watched them dance several times again during our week at sea.  I will never forget them.  Within 6 weeks after we returned home, Joni and I had enrolled in Ballroom dance classes at a nearby studio.

Here we are 1 year later.  I have lost 25 pounds.  I have better posture than I've ever had in my life.  I am more flexible and have less muscle aches and pains than I've had in the last 20 years.  Joni and I have enjoyed many, many hours of dancing together.  We've learned a lot, and yet need to learn so much more....  I just hope when I'm 85 yrs. old, and Joni is 86, that we will be seen dancing together somewhere out in the middle of the Caribbean... worrying our kids.

NOW IS OUR TIME TO DANCE

"This was written the last week of October, 2012"

Joni and I have very multi-dimensional lives. We have a lot of passions and pursue many different paths of adventure. For the last 25+ years, one of those adventures is that we have had the privilege to serve the community as a Pastor. An additional responsibility is that we serve as the Administrator of a Christian School. As you might imagine this has provided us with many unique opportunities to be with people in some of the very best and the very worst of times…

Friday morning we got a call at about 4am. A 38 yr. old father of a family in the School (4 daughters, ages 5-16) died unexpectedly of a heart attack. Joni and I immediately responded. At about 6 in the morning, with the youngest daughter sitting on my lap and her next older sister on Joni’s… I told the girls that their Daddy had died. This is a part of the job that never gets easier. There is no easy way, and I’m not sure I will ever get it completely right… How do you tell a 5 and 6 yr. old that their Daddy is gone? 

What I have learned is that Joni and I are often times just there to hold people in our arms while they cry… It is not our words that matter, but rather just the power of holding each other… the power of human touch. This is the “frame” of the dance of unspeakable grief which has no music… no rhythm. It is just stillness and tears. It’s only sound is the deep, ethereal cry of broken hearts.

A few hours later, I had to make the announcement in our School. It was a full day spent comforting the students… lots of tears… lots of hugs. After lunch, a first grader handed Joni a “card” that she had made. She said, “Miss Joni, you look sad. This is for you. I love you.” We are supposed to be comforting them and they turn it all upside down and comfort us… Life is so powerful and good…

You may be trying to figure out why I’m telling you all this. My reason is to let you know how much Joni and I needed to dance Friday night. We needed to love each other. We needed to live. We needed to dance… It was very hard to keep my “head” in mechanics of what we were doing, but my heart desperately needed to dance. We needed to hold each other and just dance… Life needs the dance. There is so much sadness and grief in the world. For many years Joni and I have seen so much of it very up-close, and raw, and unfiltered. For those of us that experience life as Joni and I do… For people that are unafraid to embrace the worst that life can deliver… We need to have an opportunity to embrace the dance. Now is our time to dance.

Life needs the dance.